Why is it so hard to teach a dog to be calm when visitors arrive?

Think about this from the dog's point of view.

1. There are signals someone is arriving. Might be a car stopping, might be the doorbell. For a guardy or nervous type of dog, this is concerning. For a more social dog, it's exciting.

   
   

2. Everyone startles. Not just the dog, you too. Who's here? You stop what you're doing (sudden change of behaviour) and look out the window (vigilance) or go to the door. The dog notices all of this.

   
   

3. When you greet the person you might be excited, or cautious, or ...

   The dog notices all of this.

   
   

4. The person may be a complete stranger (worrying for some dogs/ exciting for others) or familiar and much loved by the dog. Either way the dog is going to have feelings. Feelings will show up as behaviour.

   
   

5. You might

   * ignore your dog altogether,

   * or have half of your attention on them while struggling for control and attempting to talk to the person.

   * or you might tell the dog off.

   
   

   Ignoring the dog allows them to do whatever their emotions tell them to do in the moment.

   Struggling for control/ scolding the dog all add more drama to the moment.

   
   

6. The dog is learning that door greetings are drama laden situations where nobody is calm and settled. They act accordingly. Habits develop.

   
   

   That's why it's so hard to teach a dog to be calm when visitors arrive. The situation is anything but calm.